


Redemption

by nanuk_dain



Series: Drift Compatible [37]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Angst, Explicit Sexual Content, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, PBC (Post-Breach-Collapse)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-01
Updated: 2015-10-01
Packaged: 2018-04-24 07:36:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4910857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanuk_dain/pseuds/nanuk_dain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raleigh tries to make it up to Chuck and learns a thing or two in the process.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Redemption

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place right after "Agony Aunt". And I'm really sorry, but there's going to be some more angst and drama. Seems to be the only thing I'm writing at the moment... -_-V

_Hong Kong Shatterdome, 18th January 2025_

 

He can't stop staring at the picture. 

Raleigh is standing in the elevator that will bring him to the level of the living quarters of the Shatterdome personnel, and he can't stop staring at the photo in his hands. It's such a simple scene, just Chuck and him asleep in his bed in the medical bay. Nothing special, yet it's mesmerising in its quiet peacefulness, in the obvious affection and trust. He can't look away from the beautiful little smile on Chuck's face, from the way Chuck has cuddled up against Raleigh in his sleep. It speaks of comfortable intimacy and a need for closeness that is mirrored in Raleigh's own posture, in his hand in Chuck's messy hair, in his peaceful sleep. 

Raleigh is sure that Mako knew exactly what she was doing when she gave him that photo. It shows a side of Chuck that the world usually doesn't get to see, a side that he always had but that is carefully hidden behind a massive wall of issues and attitude - until his first drift with Raleigh. Until he was suddenly confronted with the fact that he has a perfect match.

Chuck dared to open up to him, to let him in, and Raleigh threw the door in his face at the first problematic situation. It doesn't matter that it was inadvertently, the damage is done. Raleigh should have known better, especially after their drift. He _knows_ how much of an effort it takes for Chuck to trust somebody, how much he's out of his comfort zone with this entire relationship thing. This photo, this beautiful little moment, makes Raleigh more aware of his misstep than any words could have. He just desperately hopes that Chuck is willing to give him a second chance. 

Right now, he's not so sure about that.

He remembers how empty the bed felt last night when for the first time, Chuck hadn't come back to the medical bay to sleep. Raleigh felt so cold and lonely, and his dark and tortured thoughts of Yancy had only added to his misery. He'd curled up in a ball as if that would ward off the shadows that haunted him, but it hadn't helped. The little sleep he got was restless and exhausting.

Standing there in the elevator, Raleigh makes a conscious effort to take down his shields, to open the connection of their ghost drift again. He wonders how it was possible for him not to notice that it was missing. That _he himself_ was blocking it. He's sure that a great deal of the misery of last night was his own fault, a result of unconsciously stifling his connection to Chuck.

What he receives when he tries to feel Chuck over the ghost drift is not a good omen. Chuck's shields are up, Raleigh can feel that, but the hurt still leaks through around the edges. It tells him exactly how much Chuck is affected, and Raleigh feels incredibly bad for doing that to him, never mind that it wasn't on purpose. He wonders what he can possibly say or do to convince Chuck that he didn't mean to hurt him, that he's so very sorry. 

The doors of the elevator open before he's found an solution, and Raleigh slowly makes his way through the maze of hallways to the Hansens' quarters. He needs more time to come up with a plan. Or at least an idea of what to say. It's quite obvious that he'll have to rely on words, because their ghost drift in not a working option at the moment. The missing connection makes him feel uneasy, especially when he has to deal with Chuck in a difficult situation. Like he has no way to predict how he's going to react. 

Raleigh's problem is that he's still... well, it's a kind of blend of jealous and envious that Chuck got to talk to Yancy while he didn't. He knows that Mako's right, though. It's not Chuck's fault - actually, there isn't even anything like 'fault' at play here. It was nothing but coincidence that Chuck was the one to find out that Yancy is... still somehow there. If they hadn't agreed to Doc Lightcap's experiment, chances are Raleigh would never have learned about Yancy's presence. Engaging in the neural handshake with an unconscious partner isn't exactly standard drift protocol, after all.

He should be grateful that Chuck stumbled across Yancy. If he's honest with himself, he'd rather know that Yancy is alive - _somehow_ alive - without being able to communicate with him than go through the rest of his life believing him dead. He has no idea what to do now that he knows Yancy is alive in his head, but Mako made a good point. The brightest minds and world's leading experts in drift related science are working on it, he shouldn't give up hope. Who knows what they'll come up with.

After all, nobody thought that drifting with a Kaiju was possible, either. 

Raleigh hesitates when he reaches the quarters designated to the Hansens. He still doesn't know what to say. He's standing in the middle of the hallway for a good five minutes before he musters the courage to climb the few stairs and knock on the door. It's a heavy metal door typical for Shatterdomes all over the world, and the sound of his knuckles against the steel seems more hesitant than he wanted it to be. Nothing happens, almost as if nobody is home, but Raleigh knows that Chuck is there, he feels his presence close by. He doesn't get much more than that, maybe the odd flicker of hurt mixed with anger, but it's muffled and quickly controlled.

Raleigh waits for a full minute, then he knocks again, making sure to rap harder against the metal so that the sound is more pronounced. This time the reaction is immediate.

"Go away, Raleigh." Chuck's voice is harsh and unfriendly, but otherwise emotionless. It makes an unpleasant shiver run down Raleigh's spine. He doesn't like it at all. Chuck is many things, but emotionless is not one of them.

Every attempt to feel Chuck is blocked by his shields. _Actively_ blocked. They're really good shields, too, and Raleigh guesses that they're honed by years of drifting with Herc. Chuck sure as hell didn't want his father to know all his thoughts and secrets, so he must have worked on upholding shields pretty early on. He definitely got very good at it.

It makes Raleigh feel helpless to be so utterly unable to tell what Chuck is thinking, how he's feeling. He gets a much better idea of what Chuck must have lived through when Raleigh blocked him out of his mind all of the sudden. It's crippling, and it's accompanied by a strange kind of ache. Raleigh feels like he's missing a limb.

"Please, Chuck." There's no reply at all this time. Raleigh remains standing on the threshold and waits, but Chuck keeps up his resolute silence.

After a minute or two of it, Raleigh lets his forehead sink against the massive steel door. He doesn't bother to keep the exhaustion or the misery out of his voice. "Please, Chuck, let me in."

He's not just talking about the door, but for now he'd be glad if at least that physical obstacle would be removed. Now that he can't feel Chuck, he really wants to see him so that he can get at least a general idea of what's going on inside of him.

There's only more silence. Raleigh wonders how long Chuck is planning on giving him the cold shoulder. He trusts Chuck to keep it up for quite a while, although he must be making himself as miserable as Raleigh was last night - and is right now. It's obviously not a good idea for a perfect match to interrupt their connection to each other, at least Raleigh has learned that now. He needs to somehow make Chuck understand that he didn't mean to make him miserable, that he never intended to hurt him, and that he has learned his lesson. The question is how he's supposed to do that with Chuck's shields up, the door to his quarters closed and his refusal to talk to Raleigh firmly in place.

Raleigh wishes so desperately that he had handled the situation better, that he hadn't automatically shut out the world the moment Yancy came into play. It's an instinctive reaction ever since Knifehead, based on the knowledge that nobody would ever really understand. He'd been the one to convince Yancy to disobey Pentecost's orders, after all. It was his fault, what happened. 

Raleigh takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. The steel of the door feels cold against his forehead and under his palm where his right hand is resting against the metal. His left shoulder hurts and he's exhausted. It's his body's way of telling him that he overdid it today. He feels every hour he spent out of the med bay and on his feet, every hour of sleep he didn't get last night, every hour the connection to Chuck was blocked. He wants nothing more than to curl up in Chuck's arms in a bed, to feel him in body and mind, his presence a warmth in his thoughts and a strong comfort in his back. God, he misses him so much.

Suddenly the door underneath his forehead moves. It takes Raleigh by surprise and he almost staggers in the attempt to keep from falling. He takes a step back and finds himself face to face with Chuck. 

He doesn't look too good either. His face is drawn and his eyes are guarded. Raleigh wants to kick himself again for what he did, because he's the reason Chuck looks like that. Chuck should never feel the need to protect himself against Raleigh, he should never feel wary around him. And yet that's the lesson he learned when Raleigh cut him off.

"Can I come in?" Raleigh asks carefully, because right now he doesn't dare to take anything for granted.

Chuck hesitates for a full second that almost stretches Raleigh's nerves to their breaking point, then he steps aside and opens the door fully before he walks back inside. It's as much of an invitation as he's going to get, Raleigh figures, and follows him inside. He pushes the door shut behind him and when he turns, he finds Chuck standing in the middle of the room. It's typical Ranger quarters, two neatly made bunk beds on opposite sides of the room, a small table, two chairs, a pantry kitchen that's barely wider than the fridge and the sink it holds. The door next to the kitchen is standing open and shows a basic bathroom that's just big enough to accommodate a shower, a wash basin and a toilet. 

Raleigh looks around because it's the first time he's in Chuck's quarters. He can't help being curious, and it's sobering how little the room says about Chuck. There are no pictures on the walls, and he only knows which bed is Chuck's because his boots are placed tidily at the foot of the bunk and there's an imprint in the covers that looks like Max had slept there at some point. He's not here right now, and for a moment Raleigh wonders where he is. 

One look at Chuck reminds him of the bigger problems at hand right now, though. He's still standing in the middle of the room, his arms crossed in front of his chest, and his gaze is following Raleigh on his hesitant exploration through his quarters. He hasn't said a word yet, and it makes Raleigh nervous. 

"Chuck..." Raleigh still doesn't know where to begin. He just knows that he has to say or do something soon, or Chuck will retreat again. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to cut you off. I didn't even know I was doing it..."

"Mako kicked your arse, didn't she?" It's not really a question, and Chuck's voice holds a note of dry amusement. 

"She did." Raleigh admits with an embarrassed half smile and a shrug of his uninjured shoulder. Suddenly it feels like the picture is burning in his pocket and he pulls it out. He glances at it again, then he holds it out to Chuck, catching his gaze. "She can be quite convincing."

Chuck reaches for the photo after a moment of returning Raleigh's gaze. There's still wariness in his eyes, and Raleigh wants so much to take it away, to erase it forever. 

He feels the exact moment when Chuck realises what's on the photo. It's as if the surprise makes Chuck's shields collapse, as if he suddenly doesn't want to keep them up anymore. Raleigh's mind fills with strong emotions, with insecurities and doubts and hurt and confusion. They all pass through him and leave him breathless in their sharp intensity. He's overwhelmed by the need to make Chuck realise what he means to Raleigh, to cover those painful feelings with something positive. He can think of only one way to achieve that, and that's total honesty.

"I miss you, Chuck." Raleigh says quietly, pouring all his misery of the last two days as well as his longing into their re-established ghost drift. "I miss you so much. I'm sorry for cutting you off." 

Chuck swallows hard, still staring at the photo. It takes him a long while before he looks up, catching Raleigh's gaze. There's a frown on his face, and he makes no move to come closer.

"Don't ever do that again." Chuck says without breaking the gaze. His voice is not threatening or chiding, though, it's broken and almost pleading, barely above a whisper. He even looks vulnerable, somehow small and lost in the way he hovers by the door, the photo clutched in his hand. So unlike the fierce Chuck that the world knows, and it makes Raleigh's heart clench painfully to know that he did that. That he hurt Chuck that much. He remembers that he told Herc that he would never hurt Chuck on purpose, and never mind that he hadn't done it intentionally, he still feels like he broke his word.

Raleigh allows his feelings, everything from regret to guilt and sincere apology, to seep through the ghost drift. "I promise."

Chuck falls silent and looks down at the photo again. Raleigh feels him sort through his troubled thoughts, although he can't quite grab them. He remains quiet, knowing it's Chuck's turn to speak his mind. 

"I understand it, you know?" Chuck says after a moment. He looks up and makes a point of holding Raleigh's gaze, and his voice is a strange mixture of reproachful and confused. "I may not have been there when it happened, but I lived through your memories of Knifehead. I didn't just _see_ them, I _experienced_ them. I felt what you felt. Goddamnit, Raleigh, you know that. Why did you shut me out?" 

Raleigh bites his lips, the guilt welling up again. He's not sure he has a satisfying answer to give. "I didn't think, Chuck. It's... Where Yancy is concerned, I'm so used to being left alone with all of it that I... It's a reflex to curl in on myself and suffer in solitude, just like I have always done since Yancy was ripped out of the Conn-Pod."

Chuck remains silent and just keeps looking at Raleigh, then he holds out the picture for Raleigh to see. When he speaks, his voice is warm and his words feel like a caress. "You're not alone anymore, Rals."

Raleigh has to swallow against the lump that has suddenly formed in his throat. Chuck is using their ghost drift to make him feel that he means it, and it takes Raleigh by surprise how much it affects him. The feeling of being part of a family, of knowing that there are people who will always be there for him no matter what.

Even when he screws up.

Raleigh takes a careful step closer and slowly takes hold of Chuck's free hand, infinitely grateful when Chuck lets him. He needs the physical contact, not just because he missed it those past two days, but also because he feels like he can somehow transmit through touch how much Chuck's words mean to him. "Thank you, Chuck."

Chuck gently squeezes his hand and intertwines their fingers. Raleigh feels his support through their ghost drift, and it's such a stark contrast to the misery of the past days that he begins to understand, really and truly understand, that Chuck is the most important person in his life. He doesn't ever want to lose the connection to him again. It makes him feel complete and at home in a way he hasn't felt since he left childhood behind. It's something he never expected to find, especially not after Knifehead.

That thought brings him back to the one thing that caused this entire episode of hurt feelings in the first place: The drift with Yancy. Raleigh realised already yesterday that he knows very little about what actually happened, and now is the chance to find out more. 

"Can you tell me about your drift with Yancy?" Raleigh bites his lip, he's not sure that he actually _wants_ to hear it, but he knows he has to. "I never gave you the chance to say more than the key points."

Chuck nods, then he takes a few moments to decide how and where to start. "I told you that I found myself in the Icebox when I entered the drift and that I went to your quarters. It was pre-Knifehead, which I'm sure of because I saw Gipsy in the Jaeger bay in her original design. When I knocked on your door, it wasn't you but Yancy who greeted me by telling me he'd sent you out on a run when he _felt_ me enter the drift. That's when I became suspicious."

Raleigh understands immediately. "He shouldn't have known it was a drift, never mind be able to pinpoint you entering it, had he been nothing but a memory of mine."

"Exactly. I might have inquired after that not too politely" - Raleigh can't hold back a snort hearing that - "and he explained what I already told you right after you woke up."

"That he's stuck in my brain because our drift wasn't properly disengaged, and that he sees what I see and knows what I know, but can't communicate with me. That he can only talk to me when I'm either asleep or unconscious, which I in turn experience like a dream and therefore forget upon waking. And he could only communicate with you because I was out when the drift was initiated." Raleigh repeats what he has mulled over in his head for the past two days. He tried to make sense of it, but the only conclusion he came to was that it sounds like a bad movie plot. Considering that Kaiju and Jaegers also sound like something out of a science fiction movie but are quite real, he knows that there's a very good chance it's possible, though. Not to mention that he feels with total certainty that Chuck is telling the truth, and that there are so many things about drifting that are entirely unknown that this actually doesn't seem improbable.

"A consciousness without a body, as Yancy put it." Chuck says seriously. Raleigh feels his thumb soothingly caress the back of his hand, and no matter how small the gesture, it actually does calm him. Maybe it's the fact that Chuck knows he needs the reassurance that makes him feel better.

"You came back from your run during our 'talk'." Chuck continues retelling the drift when the silence stretches. He probably feels Raleigh sinking back into troubled thoughts, and his voice interrupts them quite efficiently. 

"I did?" Raleigh looks up in surprise. He didn't know he'd been an active part of the drift-dream. 

"Yeah. Bounced in, took off your clothes and hopped into the shower, not without making us promise to go for breakfast with you afterwards."

"'Bounced in?' That doesn't sound like me." Raleigh can't help remarking. He feels a moment of unease over the ghost drift right before Chuck replies.

"Well, it was the pre-Knifehead-You." Chuck's words are careful. 

"Oh." Well, in that case 'bounced in' probably is a proper description. It's faint, but Raleigh does remember the overconfident, cocky jock he was before Knifehead quite literally beat those attitudes out of him. He hasn't thought of that guy in a long time. He seems like a stranger now, and Raleigh doesn't quite understand how he could ever have been like that.

"Yancy gave me the shovel talk, actually." Chuck deftly changes the subject, and he can't quite suppress a smirk. "Do you have any idea how weird it is to be given the shovel talk by somebody you're in a drift with, especially when that person is the supposedly dead brother of your partner? The supporting imagery was rather nasty, I can tell you that."

Raleigh frowns. He gets a sudden feeling that there's more to it that Chuck is letting on. "What supporting imagery?"

"He told me he'd destroy me if... well, if I ever hurt you." Raleigh feels a wave of pain over the ghost drift, something dark and intense that he can't quite understand. It seems an overly extreme sentiment for their current topic.

"What aren't you telling me?" Raleigh asks, because he's well aware that Chuck's reply isn't an answer to his question. Chuck's lips press into a thin line and he averts his gaze. Raleigh gives him a moment, but when it becomes clear that he won't elaborate, Raleigh gently takes hold of his chin with his free hand and makes him look up. There's something dark in his eyes, something that feels a lot like fear. It shakes Raleigh, because whatever happened in that drift-dream, it must have been bad enough that it scared Chuck. And Chuck doesn't scare easily.

"What happened, Charlie?" Raleigh can't quite hide his worry, and he knows that Chuck feels it. 

Chuck is quiet for a long moment, as if he's sorting through his thoughts, trying to find the best way how to explain. He licks his lips before he begins talking, swallows once, twice. "Yancy, he... showed me things."

"What things?" Raleigh asks and tries to ignore the bad feeling that's slowly rising in his gut.

"He was there with you. After Knifehead. In the hospital." Chuck stops, a pained frown on his face. Only then does it dawn on Raleigh that if Yancy controlled the drift, he could also access Raleigh's memories. He can't help a shiver running down his back, but he keeps quiet to let Chuck continue.

"He sent me into your memories of that time." Chuck sounds haunted, his voice is very quiet and laced with pain. "I felt the silence in your head, and how it suffocated you. I felt how you shut down, how the world ceased to exist."

Chuck seems to need a moment to find the strength to continue. Raleigh feels icy goosebumps spread all over his body. He knows where this is going. 

"I saw how you... gave up. How you just wanted it all to end." When Chuck looks at him, there's pure despair in his eyes. He knows, Raleigh realises with a shudder going through his entire body, he knows how close he came to never meeting me.

There are memories crushing down on him, memories of that time. It's the worst he's ever been, and he's tried ever since to push it back into the furthest corner of his mind. He pushed it so far back that it didn't even come out upon drifting, neither with Mako nor with Chuck. It feels like cruelty beyond measure that Yancy made Chuck experience it. Raleigh wants to say something, but he finds that his voice is not working.

"Yancy told me that if I ever... made you reach that point again, he'd destroy me." Chuck lets out a dry chuckle that sounds painful. "There was no need to threaten me, really. If I'm ever the reason you feel like that again, I'd shoot myself and spare him the effort."

Raleigh freezes on the spot and stares at Chuck. His skin prickles with unpleasant, cold goosebumps, and he shivers under the onslaught of feelings. He can't even imagine what it must have been like for Chuck to experience these darkest moments of Raleigh's life, of living through the thoughts of craving death that had rules his mind back then. _Especially_ for Chuck, who has suffered of losing loved ones before and who fears it with a vengeance. If Yancy is in my mind, Raleigh thinks, then he must know that. He must have put Chuck through it on purpose, knowing _exactly_ that it's the way to hurt him most. To scare him like nothing else could.

"He had no right." Raleigh presses out, surprised at how angry he is at Yancy at that moment. It's an entirely new feeling, one that he hasn't experienced since before Knifehead. For the first time in ages he feels the urge to punch Yancy. "I'm so sorry, Charlie."

"Don't be. It wasn't your doing, after all." Chuck steps closer and wraps his arms around Raleigh's waist, pulling him in a comforting embrace, always careful not to put pressure on the injured shoulder. Raleigh feels the tension ease and he doesn't hesitate to melt against Chuck until their bodies fit together perfectly. Only now does he realise how much he craved that kind of contact, how much he needed to be this close to Chuck. Raleigh turns his head until his nose touches the side of Chuck's neck, then he closes his eyes and takes deep breath. He loves Chuck's scent, and he lets it calm his troubled mind. 

"He taught me a valuable lesson, after all." Chuck continues after a moment of comfortable silence.

"And what's that?" Raleigh grumbles against Chuck's throat where he's hiding his face. He's still angry at Yancy.

"That I want you by my side." Chuck's voice is barely above a whisper. He press a lingering kiss behind Raleigh's ear, his tongue flickering over the sensitive skin. "Inside and outside the Conn-Pod. Forever."

A shiver runs through Raleigh's entire body, and this time it's hot and electrifying. He feels how it makes the little hairs on his skin stand up, and he can't hold back a gasp. He knows that Chuck senses his reaction over the ghost drift, knows what it does to him. Raleigh's hold on him tightens instinctively, and he presses against Chuck from head to toe. The blood is pounding in his ears and suddenly the only thing he can think of is that he needs Chuck naked, now, skin against skin, buried inside him, hot and pulsing. 

Raleigh hears Chuck groan against his neck and realises that he must have transmitted his thoughts through their connection, probably in colourful images with plenty of details. He bites Chuck's neck right above his collarbone. "Naked. Now." 

"Yeah." Chuck agrees in a rather hoarse whisper, obviously not able to form a proper sentence either. He lets go of Raleigh just long enough to rip off his t-shirt and shove down his pants and underwear in one go. Raleigh can't help smirking at the display of eager compliance. Chuck is naked in record time, and then his hands are under Raleigh's jumper. Now he's not hurrying, instead he takes his time to make sure to peel the garment off Raleigh without aggravating his injured shoulder. It touches something deep inside Raleigh to be treated with that much consideration when it's quite obvious that they both have other things on their mind right now. Nice things. Pleasant things. 

It's been too long since they've done that. Right now Raleigh doesn't care that he's not even close to recovered yet, that he should probably rest instead of getting hot and heavy with Chuck. Just then Chuck sinks to his knees in front of Raleigh, quickly undoing his boots, then he hooks his fingers in the waistband of Raleigh's pants and boxers alike and pulls them down. His fingertips trail down Raleigh's legs, a maddeningly soft touch that goes straight into his groin. Raleigh can't contain the strangled moan that escapes him when the fabric catches on his erection, teasing the flesh with friction. He's rock hard by now, and when his dick springs free of his underwear, a shudder courses through his entire body. 

Before he has recovered, he feels Chuck's hand on him, his grip strong and sure. Raleigh can't look away from the beautiful sight of Chuck on his knees in front of him, buck naked and hard for him, his eyes dark with arousal, his gaze never leaving Raleigh's face. The tension is almost palpable, thick and hot, like a caress on Raleigh's skin. He catches Chuck's smirk, and only the fraction of a second later he loses all higher brain functions when Chuck's mouth closes around him.

Raleigh would have been embarrassed by the volume of his groan had he found it in him to care. He doubles over, his hands grabbing onto Chuck's shoulders, and Raleigh can't help leaning on him. His left shoulder gives him a quick and painful reminder that it's not ready for the strain yet, and Raleigh shifts his weight to the right. His legs are quivering with the effort to remain standing, and he needs the support to keep from ending up sprawled on the floor. His breath is coming in harsh pants that more often than not include a loud moan. He's thrusting into Chuck's mouth, and it's only Chuck's strong grip on his hip that keeps him in check.

The tongue playing along his erection is driving him crazy. Chuck's lips are wrapped around him tightly, his hand firmly closed around the base of Raleigh's shaft, and he's moving with just the right speed. Raleigh knows Chuck has never done this before, he learned that during their drifts, but what he's missing in experience he makes up for with enthusiasm and the feedback he gets over the ghost drift. He seems to know exactly how to make Raleigh lose it, and his effort is paying off. Raleigh shivers and pants, his thrusts becoming irregular. He knows his legs won't last much longer, and he sends a warning over their ghost drift.

"Can't keep standing." Raleigh presses out, and he's surprised how rough his voice sounds. He doesn't want to come yet, he wants that while feeling Chuck inside of him.

Chuck gives one last, delicious lick along the underside of his dick, then he lets go, and Raleigh misses Chuck's mouth on him with a vengeance. As soon as the wet heat is gone, he wants it back so much that contemplates risking his legs giving out. A chuckle from Chuck tells him that he caught that thought loud and clear. 

"Come on, Rals, lets get to my bed." Chuck makes him step out of the pants and boxer briefs pooled around his legs and slowly rises to his feet, kissing and biting his way up. When he's standing, he nips on Raleigh's earlobe, then the side of his neck. "I have plans for you."

The images that hit Raleigh right that second leave him breathless. Chuck's smirk lets him know that he did it on purpose, and Raleigh can't say that he minds. He has a pretty good idea what's going to happen once they reach the bed, and it's a very good incentive to get there quickly. 

"I like the way you're thinking." Raleigh murmurs against Chuck's lips before claiming them in a thorough kiss. He walks backwards into the general direction of Chuck's bed, pulling him along until he feels the frame touch the back of his knees.

"Glad to hear that." Chuck slowly manoeuvres him down on the narrow bunk, and Raleigh can't help noticing how he's very careful to keep any unpleasant pressure off Raleigh's bummed left shoulder. He makes sure Raleigh is coming to rest on his right side and lies down behind him, his warm body pressed up against Raleigh's back from shoulder to feet. Raleigh immediately leans against him, enjoying the sudden spike in Chuck's arousal when his erection slips between Raleigh's thighs.

Just when Raleigh is lying back on the mattress, there's a rush of pain shooting through his right arm. He knows immediately that it's not _his_ pain. It's Chuck's, transferred to his own right arm, into the identical but less severe circuitry burns. 

"Your arm..." Raleigh turns halfway and reaches for where Chuck is propped up behind him on his right arm that's still covered in a neat white bandage. Chuck just leans down to touch his lips to Raleigh's, but doesn't ease the pressure on his arm. 

"I want it." His voice is a hoarse whisper against Raleigh's neck, and it makes a shiver of arousal course through Raleigh's body. "I want to feel it."

Raleigh's hand passes over the bandage, and his own arm flares in response. Strangely he finds that it arouses him rather than turns him off. His breath hitches, his dick stirs, and he does it again. "I feel it, too."

"I'm aware of that." Chuck smiles knowingly, then he leans down to bite Raleigh's neck just this side of too hard. "I want you to feel me." 

His free hand is wandering over Raleigh's chest, purposefully passing over one hardened nipple before it skirts lower, over his stomach and then down his flank. His teasing, feather light touch finds its way to the inside of Raleigh's thigh and Raleigh instinctively lifts his left leg to grant Chuck better access. He knows exactly where he wants those fingers and he bites his bottom lip from the pleasure of feeling Chuck's hand wrap around his dick. His head falls back as he thrusts into Chuck's fist, and he shudders from the sudden burst of arousal that comes from Chuck's erection rubbing behind his balls. Oh yes, he's totally on board with Chuck's plans for him.

When Chuck's hand retreats, Raleigh wants to complain until he hears the unmistakable sound of a cap of a lube bottle being popped open. He can't help a teasing grin and turns his head enough to look at Chuck. "When did you find the time to get supplies?"

"I made it a priority." Chuck's grin is rather dirty, but it doesn't hide the slight blush on his cheeks that Raleigh finds utterly adorable. "Thought we might need it."

As if to prove his point, his slicked up finger finds Raleigh's entrance and plays around it before returning with more lube. It slowly slips into him and causes Raleigh's voice to be slightly shaky when he replies, "Good thinking."

He doesn't much care for words after that. Raleigh closes his eyes and lets his head fall back until it rests against Chuck's shoulder. He concentrates on the finger that eases in and out with careful movements before it finds his prostate and causes him to shake with the sudden burst of ecstasy. He hasn't even come down from it before the next hit, and he groans loudly, his mind reeling with arousal. 

Chuck really internalised the golden rule of serving any preparation with plenty of pleasure, Raleigh muses and allows his hips to push back on Chuck's fingers, first one, then two. Chuck takes his time, opening him up with slow scissoring motions and plenty of lube. He never stops biting Raleigh's neck, feeling over the ghost drift how much it turns him on, and makes a point to leave a mark on his injured shoulder. Raleigh loses any concept of time and space. His world consists only of Chuck's warm body in his back, Chuck's fingers inside of him, Chuck's mouth on his neck and Chuck's presence in his mind. He's engulfed by Chuck, filled by Chuck, and he doesn't want it any other way. He feels Chuck's hard dick rest heavy and hot against the inside of Raleigh's thigh, and he can't wait to finally feel it pulse inside him.

It's as if Chuck read his mind, which he probably did, because only a few seconds later he pulls his fingers out of Raleigh. The feeling of emptiness doesn't last long, though, and before Raleigh can complain, the head of Chuck's erection pushes against his hole and slips in easily. The thorough preparation is paying off, allowing him to slide inside with one long thrust, giving Raleigh exactly what he wants. He feels stretched and filled, and he loves it. He makes no effort at all to hold back his feelings, instead he pours them into their ghost drift, wanting Chuck to _know_ without a doubt what he's doing to Raleigh, how great he makes him feel.

Chuck shivers in his back, clearly caught up in the intense sensations Raleigh is passing on to him. It takes him a moment to establish a quick rhythm that's meant to bring Raleigh off, and it leaves Raleigh panting with ecstasy. Chuck takes hold of his leg, his hand a hot spot against Raleigh's skin, and Raleigh pushes back into his every thrust. There are little bursts of pain in his right arm at every thrust, his circuitry burns feeling raw where Chuck is leaning on his own. Every bout of ache pushes Raleigh higher, every hit to his prostate makes him see stars and every time Chuck licks or bites his neck almost causes his senses to overload. Oh man, he's not going to last much longer.

"Charlie..." Raleigh arches his back to get Chuck deeper inside him. He knows that Chuck feels that he's close, and just when he gets to the edge, Chuck takes hold of Raleigh's dick and begins to jerk him in time with his thrusts. Raleigh's eyes are closed, he wants to feel it all, soak it all up, indulge in every second of total bliss. Chuck's breath is hot against his skin, a gentle noise in his ear accentuated with dark groans, a steady rhythm that's identical with his own pants. Lips press behind Raleigh's ear, a hot tongue leaves a trail down his neck, and then, between two rugged breaths, "I love you, Rals."

Raleigh feels the words before they even leave Chuck's mouth. Feels the wave of warmth that engulfs him entirely and leaves him breathless. It makes him feel like he's going to explode with sensations, feelings, emotions, and before he has the time to react at all, Chuck hits his prostate just right and he's coming with an almost blinding force. His mind goes blank, nothing but Chuck's words and his touch exist, amplifying the pleasure until he's wrecked. He shudders under the onslaught of ecstasy that's caused by Chuck's orgasm looping back to him through their ghost drift, and he doesn't bother to hold back the hoarse groans that shake his body. He feels Chuck's hot cum inside of him, feels Chuck's dick pulsing in the same rhythm as the blood pounding in Raleigh's ears. 

Raleigh sags down, his heavy breathing loud in the room, joined by Chuck's pants. Chuck is plastered against his back, still buried inside him, his erection softening now that they're both spent. Chuck's hand is still wrapped around him, covered in semen, but Chuck doesn't seem to mind at all. Just like Raleigh, he's too busy trying to regain his breath. Raleigh is beyond exhausted, his energy reserves are almost entirely depleted, but he still feels great.

He's still blown away by what Chuck just said. He knows he didn't imagine it because he still picks up on Chuck's intense feelings through their connection, and the depth of his affection is as clear as day. There are no shields anymore, not the slightest effort to hide it. It's overwhelming and addictive and Raleigh never ever wants to miss this feeling again. 

He lets his head fall back until he can look at Chuck who's still propped up on his burnt right arm behind him. Raleigh feels the dull pain pulsing in his own arm, and he still loves this additional connection between them, just as he loves the scars on Chuck's skin that match his own. Chuck's eyes are hooded in the aftermath of the mind boggling orgasm, but the expression is clear and warm. His gaze feels like a caress.

"By the way, Charlie, I love you too." Raleigh whispers with a smile and pulls him down into a lazy kiss that feels like a claim.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked the sexy times! I thought you all deserved it after this long period of abstinence XD Make me very happy and leave me a wee comment? Please?


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